While I was going to
call this post 50 Things I Love About Brazil, I don't think that
would be accurate. While I do love many things about Brazil - the
people I've met here, the landscapes, and judging from the number of
kilos on the weighing scales, much of the food too – some of the
following are merely observations, rather than things I like about
the place. Some of them might even exist elsewhere. Also, anyone can tell you, Brazilian or
non-Brazilian, that the country isn't without its problems - indeed,
many Brazilian people I've met get annoyed with what they see as the
typically foreign-held viewpoint that Brazil is simply a country of
samba, soccer and carnaval - it is much more than that of course, and
some of these people feel that these superficial aspects distract
attention from some of the other issues affecting the country. So,
the following are just some of my observations of certain
"Curiosidades Brasileiras" - some of which I like, some
which I don't like, but all of which make it a unique and fascinating
country to live in.
In three weeks time I
will be leaving here, and I have to say, I'll be doing so with a
heavy heart. Inspired by two pieces I read, 50 Reasons to love Ireland (written by Irish Times contributors and obviously reflecting their interests) and this fabulous – and, from what I've seen here,
accurate – blog post by a German chap living in Curitiba – about
a month ago I decided to begin compiling some of my observations on
Brazilian life, society, culture, sport and, given my field of work,
language. Only this weekend a friend of mine pointed me in the
direction of this piece, written by a French guy living here. In the
meantime, here is my list of observations from my time here –
I'd love to hear if you have any comments on them!
- The word “Gente”, which means “we/us/guys/folks” – sounds like “James” when it's pronounced in Portuguese. When people make suggestions to groups, such as “Vamos, gente” (Let's go, folks!) it still makes me feel really popular, and undeservedly influential – that I have the final say about whether we should go or not!
- Portuguese can be a great language for inventing new words in – all you have to do is adding the diminutive suffix -inho or -inha onto the end of words – which functions just like the Irish language's -ín. So if you wanna ask someone for a beer but you don't want to go too mad you invite them out to “Tomar uma Cervejinha.” Then at the end of the night you ask the barman for a “Saiderinha” - a Saidera being the Irish “deoch an doras” or the English “one for the road.” Of course, some people will claim that “segunda saideras” and “terceira saideras” exist too, but that's a debate for another night. Probably a debate to have with a weary barman in fact...
- “Cara” means man, dude, sham or guy, and I find it a coincidence that “cara” is of course the Irish word for friend.
- “Jeitinho” translates roughly as “the knack”, “a nod and a wink” or “way of doing something” – often “way around something” and that something is usually an obstacle like a stifling bureaucracy, a requirement to follow procedures correctly or that irritating thing we call The Rule of Law. Taken to an extreme level, when it manifests itself in corruption, nepotism and miscarriages of justice, it obviously has it flaws, but I have always felt that in many situations, bit of flexibility helps. A book on Brazilian society I read, written by Larry Rohter, an American journalist who has live here since the 1970s, said jeitinho is far more common in Brazil than in Anglo-Saxon societies. The conclusion I drew from that was that Ireland is therefore no Anglo-Saxon society! Some people say that the prevalence of jeitinho emerged from the Colonial Era, when Brazil's resources had to be sent back to the Colonial master, Portugal – people here felt such a rule was unjust, and began to ignore it as a result.
- I've often heard people complain about the bureaucracy here. I don't know if it's any worse in Brazil than it is in other countries – for me, bureaucratic red tape is annoying anywhere in the world. What has been annoying for me though, is when certain service providers require you to have a CPF number (Revenue Registration Number) for nearly everything. To buy a bus ticket online, to join the video store, to buy concert tickets online: you need a CPF number. Not very foreigner friendly. Perhaps with the World Cup and Olympics coming up and the expected influx of tourists such service providers will adjust their conditions to be a bit more flexible.Continuing on the bureaucracy theme, on my first weekend here, local elections were held here. My boss related the following exchange he had at the polling centre:Election Official: Hi Célio, how are you?Célio: Great thanks, yourself? I'd like to vote.Election Official: Sure. Can I see your ID please?Célio: But you've known me for over 30 years! You just said “Hi Célio!” to me!Election Official: Can I see your ID please?
I suppose such exchanges are reasonably common worldwide, wherever you have to deal with bureaucrats. And perhaps, when it comes to something as sacred as democracy, it's no bad thing to have these checks in place, especially when you consider that within living memory the country was ruled by various dictatorships.
- Queuing to leave nightclubs. They have a system in many places where you're given a card on entry, then when you order your drinks at the bar the bartender simply scans your card. The fact that you don't hand any money over while ordering your drinks can make you feel much richer or much more generous than you are in reality – dangerous! It means you then have to pay on exit, this is where the queuing part comes in. You then get your receipt stamped, and only then can you show it to the burly bouncer blocking the exit. The first time that I experienced this system, I managed to lose my receipt in the 5 second walk form the payment counter to the door – no amount of my “presente de Natal” offering (attempted bribing!) or any other form of jeitinho would convince the bouncer to grant me my freedom!
- Sometimes I hear about Brazilian people who've been to Ireland talking about Irish "knackers". To clarify, I would define a "knacker" as a young person who engages in petty crime and violence, often hanging around city centres behaving in an intimidating and threatening way, asking people for cigarettes, money and being a general nuisance. It just sounded strange hearing such an Irish word being dropped into the middle of Brazilian Portuguese conversations! As far as I know, the Brazilian Portuguese equivalent word is “mano”, and yes, their ones dress and walk the same as other manos the world over.
- “Vagabundo” is their great word for any ne'er-do-well, gurrier.
- The road between Sao José dos Campos and Ubatuba, the road between São Paulo and Santos, the road between Paraty and Trindade. More like rollercoasters than roads!
- Karabukspor vs Galatasaray was on yesterday. I managed to catch the last 15 minutes of it. The cliché about the Brazilians loving their football is true, if the TV schedules are anything to go by. There are a multitude of local championships to choose from, then there's always the midweek Copa Liberatadores games, while on our TV I've watched English Premiership and Championship games, French, German, Spanish, Portuguese, Dutch, Russian, Italian and the above-mentioned Turkish League matches, not to mention International Friendlies. It was a surreal experience listening to Brazilian commentators give their take on Paul McShane! ESPN Brazil were even advertising the Athens derby next week, for Christ's sake! Heaven for football hipsters.
- The local club matches aren't much to write home about it seems... empty stadiums, professional teams pitted against semi-pro sides and a reputation for crowd violence, means that it's not very well supported – the public are voting with their feet and seeking their entertainment elsewhere.
- The commentators really do say GOOOOOOOOOOOOOLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!! even if it's just Millwall v Wigan, Ireland v Poland, the Moscow Derby, the Minas Gerais Championship, or one of the games from the above-mentioned Turkish league. Handy if you've nipped out to put the kettle on – you can be certain that something worth returning for has happened!
- The sheer unpronouncability of some of the placenames here. Guaratinguetá. Pindamonhangaba. Itaquaquecetuba. That's because they come from the indigenous Tupi-Guarani languages, and can be difficult to pronounce. However, when you do finally master their pronunciation, it's pretty satisfying to say them!
- When I was asked what the indigenous people of Ireland are called. I was nearly about to answer, then I realised we don't have any indigenous people in Ireland, or do we? I was then stopped in my tracks. What are they? Who are they? Who were they? The Celts? Travellers? The Tuatha De Danann? It's another reminder of the diversity of Brazilian people.
- I like the way “Facebook” is pronounced by Brazilians.
- And on the subject of Facebook, Ela é Top by MC Bola, the song beloved of Brazilian boy racers everywhere seems to be about creeping on Facebook. And on the subject of boy racers, here they don't just soup up Honda Civics... the ride of choice seems to be a pick-up truck, with a huge speaker system installed in the back, so they can crawl slowly through the streets with the windows down and the system up, passing bars where non-boy racers are having normal nights out.
- And on the subject of boy racers, Horse Outside culture seems to be alive and well in Brazil, at least in the provincial towns in the Sul de Minas. There's one guy, a town legend, who rides through the streets of Itajubá in his horse and trap and he with a sound system installed in his cart.
- And yes, many Brazilian women are indeed absolutely stunningly beautiful.
- And continuing on the subject of rides, they have a great system here called Caronas de Itajubá – it's basically hitch-hiking for the Facebook generation. If you want to travel from Itajubá, to São Paulo for example, you put your request on the page, and, for the price of the petrol, if someone's travelling at that time you get a lift to your destination, plus 3 hours of good conversation instead of 4 hours of a sweaty bus.
- Actually, the buses here aren't sweaty – they're generally very well air-conditioned to the point of being cold. Bring a jumper.
- I quite like the Brazilian bus system. When you put your luggage into the hold of one of the coaches, they put a sticker on it with a code, and give a copy to you. You can only claim your bag at your destination by producing your sticker. This eliminates the fear that comes with Irish bus journeys every time the Bus Éireann man reminds us to “Stand Clear, Luggage Doors Are Operatin'” when your bus is stopped in Moate or Nenagh or Gort... no offence to any of these places, but they all happen to lie on Bus Éireann routes, and only a system of mutual trust is what stops people stealing others' baggage.
- Portuguese idioms:“Tá no inferno, abraça o capeta.” = “When you're in hell, you might as well hug the devil.” It's used when someone is already in trouble, so they may as well continue acting as they have been doing, because their punishment's not going to get any worse. Similar to the Irish idiom, “You might as well be hung for a sheep as hung for a lamb.”“Pica a mula.” = “Poke the mule.” Means scram, get lost, F- off!“Mao de vaca” = “Cow's hand”. It means someone's tight-fisted/mean/stingy/ Cavanperson. Presumably because cows never pay their way because they can't hold money in their hooves.“Olhos de cara” = “Eyes of your face” - it means the same as “An arm and a leg” - used to complain about something, such as tomatoes these days, being very expensive. I find it a disgusting image really, when it's taken literally!
- Gata means an attractive-looking woman. Chata means an annoying and boring woman. Don't do what I did and get these two terms mixed up. But I guess we learn from mistakes, don't we?
- Chata/Chato means both boring and annoying. I think this makes sense – most boring things (i.e., Ironing) could also be described as annoying and vice versa.
- "Né?" Add it onto the end of any statement and you'll be considered fluent! It's a question tag, an abbrevaited form of Nao é (Isn't it?) and functions in much the same way as the Kerry 'hwah?
- The Belo Horizonte accent.
- Brazilian barbecues. See earlier remarks about the extra kilos.
- Grilled cheese on a stick. Queijo espeto. Incredible.
- Despite all the greasy, delicious junk food, (Salgados is what they're called – and I was advised that the dirtier-looking the boteko, the better the salgados!), many Brazilians still have great figures! (See #18!) The food is so good though – coixinha de frango, quiche de frango, pastels, pão de queijo... Hell they'll even serve you bacon and cheese chips, in the bar, rather than having to wait until the chipper afterward! One of life's great mysteries – why isn't this South American nation a country of North American-sized people? (Though of course there are exceptions of course – I shared a 16 hour night bus journey in January with a generously-proportioned lady who easily took up about three-quarters of my seat too... didn't sleep much that night!)
- Livraria Cultural in São Paulo – one of my favourite bookshops, indeed shops, I've ever been in.
- In 1870 Limerick had a higher population than São Paulo. It doesn't any more.
- The music scene – sertanejo, pagode, samba, techno, rock – it's all here! And nearly all of it will put a smile on your face and get you dancing! Some great cover bands too – Barzim in Itajubá is a great spot for Rolling Stones cover bands and the like. Some of the original artists I've enjoyed listening to here include Os Mutantes, Nação Zumbi, Tom Ze, Seu Jorge e Carolina, Tim Maia, Gui Boratto, Planet Hemp, and plenty of samba versions of everyone from Bob Marley to U2 and probably lots of other bands I don't know the name of!
- Some marketing research firm has gone to the trouble of publishing the average monthly salaries of different soccer supporters by the club they support. I can think of no conceivable reason why they'd do this, if only to elevate antagonisms between rival supporters.
- You don't meet many Irish people here. You're far more likely to meet Brazilian people who have studied there or have friends living there. That being said, it didn't stop ESPN Brasil from screening the documentary, the premiere of which I saw in the Belltable, called “Munster Rugby: A Limerick Love Affair”. Also, my clan's pub, O'Malley's of São Paulo, sure know how to throw a good St Patrick's Day party!
- Whenever I curse in Portuguese, or announce that I'm a Corinthinans supporter, I generally get the one of two polar reactions – one of shock disgust and horror, or immediately embrace me as one of their own. “Vai Corinthians!” “Não! Você é um Corinthiano? Caralho, cara!”
- Lula and his legacy seem to divide opinions as much as my Corinthians shirt. Some admire the man with little formal education, but “a doctorate in charisma” for the progress the economy made during this time; others feel he benefited from being at the right place at the right time – in charge of the country during a commodities boom, and they decry some of the spending done by his government while in power, while are equally exasperated by the levels of corruption by those in power during his time in office.
- Depending on the time of year, there can be a 2, 3 or 4 hour time difference between Brazil and Ireland. Often there is a much larger temperature difference too, though surprisingly enough, not always – the temperature can get down to minus 3 in the mountainous town of Campos do Jordao, the “Brazilian Switzerland” in the winter.
- Portuguese verb conjugations can be hard; but Brazilian hand language is even harder. Mastering the flick of the hand knuckle crack they do over here is one of my proudest achievements.
- The Cataratas (Waterfalls) at Foz do Iguaçu. My boss said he never even tries to describe them to people who've never been there yet – words can't do them justice. However, this is a simple blog post, words are all I have (apart from photos and videos of course) so let me just say that they are magnificent. Unforgettable. Majestic. There are many ways you can see them, including by helicopter if you desperately need to get rid of your money somehow, but I'll describe my experience there. You enter the national park on the Argentinian border by bus, and the bus drops you off at a forest trail that hugs the left bank of the River Paraná. As you walk through the forest, every so often the trees clear, giving you a stunning view of the tumultuous falls. They are over a kilometre in width. At the end of the trail, there is a metal viewing platform, which extends over the the river, leaving you facing directly in front of the largest cascades, right up close. You get saturated, which isn't too bad really, because the rainforest is very humid. Personally I'd love to see a How It's Made Discovery Channel type programme about the construction of the viewing platform – fair play to the engineers and labourers behind that project!
- Because Brazil is well-established on the backpacker trail, you're never too far from a weekend away with other travellers. And you might even run into Jethro Tull.
- The BRT.My running career took me to the city of Rio de Janeiro last weekend. Whilst there, I scaled the Sugar Loaf in the company of my would-be hosts for the weekend. However, owing to the fact that the Rio Half starting line lied no less than 38km from said hosts' apartment, it was deemed sensible by all concerned that I stay in a hostel a mere 2km from same starting line for Saturday night itself. So, at about 7:30pm, our Sugar Loaf had been climbed up and descended down, so there on nothing for it but for me to catch my bus back out to Recreio where my hostel was. So Recreio being a pretty huge suburb, I wasn't sure about where to get off in order to be near my hostel. So I ended up passing through Recreio, then a favela, and finally the countryside. It was at that point that I asked the motorista if we had passed Recreio, which I had suspected we had, and he confirmed, that yes, indeed we had.Anyway, he dropped me near a roundabout near stray dogs and pointed me in the direction of this glass-enclosed Luas-station-looking building, which I entered, safe from stray dogs I guess. The building was of course a BRT Transoeste station. The BRTs are the buses pioneered in Curitiba, the Mecca of Public Transport Nerds everywhere, and By God, what an experience. You have a whole lane in the middle of the dual carriageway, blocked off by a high kerb, given over to the BRT bus, which, by the way, is three-buses long. The bus stops even have platforms. And Christ Above, does the driver floor it or what. An experience I'll take with me to the grave. And an entirely unexpected and unplanned experience too at that. Of course the diversion and associated delay meant I slept in for the Half-Marathon, showed up late. Now, it's time to stop blaspheming and get on with this list.
- A Capitale Nacional de Pé de Moleque: Piranguinho. Brazil goes in for naming their towns as the “national capital of such-and-such”. Well, maybe Brazilian towns in general don't, but Piranguinho, the village I work in once a month, does. Pé de Moleque, which translates as Urchin's Foot, is a toffee-like, fudgy peanut candy, beloved by dentists everywhere as it keeps them in jobs.
- “Parabéns!” (Congratulations!) is a typical birthday greeting. What are you congratulating me about? What have I done to deserve this praise? Avoided getting hit by a bus for yet another year? Anyway, I'm not complaining about getting congratulated once a year for something I didn't really have to put much effort into, it's nice and I suppose it's the thought that counts, to my gringo ears it still sounds strange!
- In restaurants, if there's a group of you, you can buy a 2 litre bottle of Coke. Or Guaraná. Better than being fleeced and having to pay the eyes of your face for individual small glassed bottles!
- Café Vadinho, Praça Central, Itajubá. The slogan on the waiter's shirt says it's “O Melhor Café do Mundo” - I don't know if that refers to the coffee or the café... the coffee's OK, though I think the coffee in Café Floresta on the other side of town is much better, but the café in general is a city institution. The salgados (see Point 29) are the best I've ever tasted, the coffee and juices are excellent, and you'll get a good slagging from the waiters too – at least I did when I mistakenly ordered a “Vitamina com Banana e Frango” (A smoothie with banana and chicken) instead of the “Vitamina con Banana e Morango (Strawberry)” that I meant to ask for!
- Over here, sharing really is caring, at least when it comes to eating and drinking out. At barbecues here, the meat is cut up into tiny pieces, put on a plate in the centre of the table, and everyone shares the plate – different from the Individualist, Anglo-Saxon hamburger staple of the Estadunidenses to the North. Similarly, when you go for a beer, or a “cervejinha”, you typically order a large bottle of beer, and this is shared out among the group in small glasses. I like it. It serves a practical purpose: Brazil being a hot country, a small glass of beer is less likely to get warm as quickly as a pint glass of beer.* Plus I think it's a really sociable way of going for a drink. Though this sharing malarkey can be taken to extremes – I once benefited from a Big Mac being carved up with a knife and fork and distributed among the people at the table... nice, but there was no need really.
*On the subject of cold beer, I've frequently been asked if we drink warm beer in Ireland. Well I suppose if 4 degrees is warm by Brazilian imbibers' standards then yes, I guess we do. A few months back I was at a barbecue when I got the shock of my life when one of my hosts grabbed my glass of beer and chucked the contents onto the grass – a sin akin to taking another man's wife where I come from. As I looked at him in exasperation, he explained that unknown to me, my beer had become too hot – he was simply rescuing me from the dire consequences of drinking hot beer, and dutifully refilled my glass! - The napkins in cafés and bars are not fit for purpose – they are terrible, in fact – they don't absorb anything!The 12 hours it took to travel 300km from Paraty to São Paulo through traffic in January on the Sunday at the end of a public holiday.The high-security perimeter fence surrounding the campus of Universidade de São Paulo, one of the country's most prestigious universities. It's obviously there for a reason – but is it a symptom of wider problems in the country? On that note, the perverse state of affairs exists where the best schools in the country are private, while the best universities are public – so children of the rich get the best exam results and therefore the best access to the publicly-funded universities; while poorer ones, if they manage to get through the public school system, have to work while they study at fee-paying private universities.The stinking canal that flows across the road from the Universidade de São Paulo campus, alongside the CPTM train line – I pity the commuters who have to take that train in the summer.TIM Brasil's will-they, won't-they relationship with providing mobile phone coverage.Brazilian ATMs love-hate relationship with gringo bank cards.Showers shouldn't have to have instructions advising you how not to electrocute yourself.Toilet paper should go in the toilet.The senseless, mindless crime we see too often on the nightly news.
Crackolandia.Remembering Portuguese Verb Conjugations.Some of the contrasts you can see between the haves and have-nots here: one of the most visible one is Rio de Janeiro's Rocinha Favella, which sits, crammed on a hill overlooking the Gavea Golf and Country Club on one side, the Sheraton Resort on the other.Big Brother Brazil 13.Corruption: it has plagued Brazilian society for generations. “Aos meus amigos, tudo, aos meus inimigos, o rigor da lei,” is one phrase apparently used by those who engage in corruption - “For my friends, everything; for my enemies, the rigour of the law.”
Cheese is considered a viable component of a sweet dessert. Not a separate cheese course, no, but as integral as ice cream. There's a particular dessert called “Romeo e Julieta” - cheese with this Goiaba fruit marmalade... now if my memory from Shakespeare's play or at least Baz Lurhmann's film is anything to go by, I thought that the whole point of the story was that Romeo and Juliet where never meant to hook up? When I aired my concerns about this dessert to a fellow diner he said that there is a saying here: “A dessert without cheese, is like love without a kiss.” Right.Rice and beans. They're fine. Grand. That's all.And finally, for a country with such a great climate, there seem to be very few public swimming pools – most of these seem to be located behind the walls of private country clubs or gyms (Gyms, confusingly, are called Academias here!). For a nation of beach-lovers, I think it would be great if the government could provide more pools – it would improve people's health and bring safety benefits too.As you have probably guessed, this point is about things I don't particularly like about Brazil... although if I was completely honest, I have to admit that I did watch, and sometimes even enjoy, BBB13 occasionally! - The immense beauty of the country. The waterfalls; the mountains of Minas Gerais; the beaches of the Littoral Norte de São Paulo; Florianópolis' waterfront promenade and the beaches of the Ilha de Santa Catarina; the geographically spectacular setting of Rio de Janeiro; Colonial, tranquil, Paraty – the town that time forgot; Vila Madalena in São Paulo and the bright lights of Avenida Paulista at night; Santos' dockside, gritty, historical charm; Ubachuva when the rain stays away; the wildlife, be it the Toucans in Foz do Iguaçu, the alligator I saw near work, or the brightly-coloured, noisy maritacas that drive my boss crazy... I could go on.
- The sheer size of the country. When I flew over here in October, I was tracking the position of the plane on the in-flight screen, and as we passed over the North Coast, I presumed we'd be touching down in São Paulo pretty soon. Nope. It took a further 4 or 5 hours for us to land! They call it a Continental-sized country for a reason. I'm not going to get to visit the Amazon, the Nordeste, which everybody raves about having some of the most beautiful beaches in the world, whether they've been there themselves or not, and countless other places. The good thing about this is there's so much that I still haven't seen yet, so there are so many places left to visit when I return!
- The people! Yes, Brazil has its problems just like everywhere else but I have been bowled over by the warmth, humour and friendliness of the people I have met since I arrived here last October. Old friends and new, their families, colleagues – the hospitality and generosity with which I have been received here has been amazing. You know who you are. This is the main reason why I will definitely be back, and why, now that I think about it, I think this list could be more appropriately called 50 Things I Love About Brazil.Obrigado a todos! Terei saudades de vocês! Até mais!
